UFC 263 Breakdown & Betting Predictions!
Well, ladies and gentlemen—let me rephrase. Well, all of you dirty, disgusting degenerate gamblers; UFC 263 is upon us and IIIIIIIIIIIIIITTTTTTSSSSSS TIIIIIIIIIMMMEEEEE for the bash brothers’ flawless expert picks. Uncle Dana has brought an absolute masterpiece of a fight card to feast our eyes upon Saturday night while we engolf our gullets with local hometown pizza and wings, cheap, gas station light beer and other substances of choice. The bash bros (James aka JMo and Jacob) are ready to give their opinions for every fight on the main card, as well as their favorite bets. It’s gonna be a good one folks. Buckle up, crack a Busch Light, throw on your old circa mid 2000s Tapout flatbill, your favorite Affliction shirt and get ready for the best UFC card of this year, thus far.
*odds via MyBookie.ag (6/10/2021)
Light Heavyweight Bout: Paul Craig 14-4-1 (+250) vs. Jamahal Hill 8-0-0-1 NC (-310)
JMo:
This fight is an interesting fight to say the least. It is a classic proven veteran in the Scot Paul Craig vs young surging talent and headhunter, Jamahal Hill. This is the first fight of the main card and it’s going to start off with an upset. The money is going to be all over Hill—with good reason. He’s a young stud who knocks dudes heads off their necks BUT I think that his lack of experience hands him the first loss of his career. Craig is known for his great grappling and this man is known to be one of the toughest guys in the division. Craig has the heart, spirit and Scottish pride of Mel Gibson in braveheart. You’ll have to kill that motherfucker to get him out of the ring. I believe the Scot’s superior grappling leads to a late submission.
Prediction: Paul Craig (+250)
Jacob:
Paul Craig has the gears of a fucking 1969 shelby cobra. He is not going to stop until the final bell rings, and somewhere in the 15 minutes of war, he is going to find a hole in the undefeated Jamahal Hills’ game and win by submission. I personally just dont think Hill has faced this level of competition and that will show when he steps up in competition I believe. All Hill has is a puncher's chance, because strange things tend to happen in this sport.
HAMMER EEM!!!
Welterweight Bout: Demian Maia 28-10 (+195) vs. Belal Muhammad 18-3 1 NC (-235)
JMo:
Another great fight for the fans as one of the OGs, BJJ legend Demian Maia squares off against Belal “Remember the Name” Muhammad. I believe that this fight will most likely head to decision, giving that Maia relies to heavily on hoping the fight moves to the ground, and Muhammad is going to keep his distance and utilize striking. Maia is getting up there in age, and it is likely it will be a game of cat and mouse the whole fifteen minutes. This most likely will be the most boring fight on the card IMO due to both fighters feeling each other out the majority of the fight. I believe that Belal has what it takes to win on the judges' scorecards unanimously.
Prediction: Belal Muhammad (-235)
Welterweight Bout: Nate Diaz 21-12 (+325) vs. Leon Edwards 18-3 (-475)
JMo:
When you hear MMA or UFC or just anything that involves it, it is really hard not to think of Stockton, CA’s original gangster brawler Nate Diaz. He steps in the octagon to get busy with England’s elite striker Leon “Rocky” Edwards. Any fight that involves Nate Diaz is must-see television. The dude is an absolute warrior and gives absolutely zero fucks about who he fights, when he fights them, or what you or anyone else thinks about him. He’s game. Leon Edwards has been on a tear, winning 8 out of his last nine fights and his last fight was a no-contest after nearly gouging Belal Muhammad eye out in March. This fight with Nate Diaz will be an absolute war for him. He’s never fought anyone so tough and probably never will. Edwards has been accused of padding his record in hopes it springs him into title contention without going through anyone. I think Diaz’s legendary cardio and jiu-jitsu earns him a huge underdog win via submission late in the fight. The last time he was this big of an underdog he choked Con-man McGregor into a tap. Dude’s a legend and I will absolutely be backing him at (+325). Give me all of that, I’ll die on that hill.
Prediction: Nate Diaz (+325)
Co-Main Event Flyweight Championship Bout: FW Champion Deiveson Figueiredo 20-1 (-220) vs. Brandon Moreno 18-5 (+180)
JMo:
This fight will head as the Co-Main event at 125 lbs. Yes 125LBS! These dudes are little but don’t let this fool you. These are some of the most entertaining fights you will ever watch. These cats fight at about 150 mph for the whole distance. Like farts in a skillet.
This fight is a run-back of the December 2020 war (fight of 2020 in my opinion) that literally ended in a draw. THAT NEVER HAPPENS. It was a bloodbath that left me and many others with the same feeling—”who the fuck won that?” I can see why it was a draw. But this time, it will not end in a draw. Figgy has dominated the whole division other than Moreno but the last fight was fresh off of recovering from a tough stint with COVID. Moreno is one tough motherfucker, scrappy as all hell. But, Deiveson is one of the most well-rounded, dominant fighters in the whole UFC. Figgy’s feeling good, and he’s going to continue his reign as Flyweight champ, and he will finish the tough Mexican scrapper Moreno inside the distance.
Prediction: Deiveson Figueiredo (-220)
Main Event Middleweight Championship: MW Champion Israel Adesanya 20-1 (-270) vs. Marvin Vettori 17-4 (+210)
JMo:
The UFC’s most recent cash cow, Israel “The Last Stylebender” Adesanya and dominant Middleweight champ squares off against Marvin “The Italian Dream” Vettori. Izzy’s fresh off of the first loss of his career, a decision loss to the Light Heavyweight champ, Jan Blachowicz. It was definitely ballsy for Izzy to head up and fight 20 lbs up, and he lost but it was a good fight. With that being said, he has been dominant for the most part at 185 and this is where this fight is happening. He has beaten Vettori before, but by a close split decision. Vettori is a heavy handed, experienced grappler who is probably the strongest fighter in the division. This fight… will not end the same way it did the first time though. I’m confident Izzy’s long reach advantage and the best striking since prime Jon Jones and Anderson Silva will help him prevail and get back in the win column. Vettori will get pieced up standing. This fight will end inside of the distance by KO/TKO in the Stylebender’s favor.
Prediction: Israel Adesanya (-270)
JMo aka Dr.Lock’s long stretch parlay of the evening: Izzy, Figgy, Diaz, Muhammad, Craig (+4375) $10 pays out at $437.53
JMo’s safe parlay: Izzy and Figgy (+99) $20 pays $19.37